Friends

This weekend, aside from being a great weekend of worship, was a weekend of discovering, re-discovering, and learning about friends.

I've re-connected with two friends of mine from two years ago. They live in Corner Brook, but I cut off my relationship with one of them (and in the process, the other) because I was afraid of the influence they had on me. They're Christians, but I was too maliable, I guess, and they weren't on the same page. I don't know if we're on the same page now, but we're friends. And that's enough.

I've re-connected in a new way with a friend from St. John's. We've sort of drifted apart, but this weekend, we got all up to speed. The next few months will have to be filled with hanging out.

In that process, I've grown closer to another mutual friend, even if only by a hair. We're so alike, and he's such a great guy. Much more hanging will have to happen.

In that process, I've met his friend, who is even MORE of like mind. Once I get Guitar Hero II for X Box 360, we'll have to have a "rawk konsert!"

I've realized that some good friends, are just different. Nothing wrong with that, we'll just have to connect in different ways. I've reconciled a little bit with some friends. Some friends' jury is still out, but those people are allowed to be like that. I'm sure I've given them reason.

I spent money on ice cream with a friend. We talked about our lives in the past three months. I got the most intense hug, possibly ever. I've known intelectually that people care, and a handfull have shown it. But I've felt it only a few times, from a few people, in the past few months, (not only in St. John's). Except, of course, for Mommy. Because that's just what she does. So this weekend was a big smack-in-the-face of [human] love.

Also:

I've decided I need to stop thinking about women. I don't know what my excuse is, whether it's some underlying idea coming from my family situation, whether it's just being around so many girls, or whether it's just a changing season in my life, but I just need to pull back on the reigns.

I had a rule that I wouldn't date anybody unless I knew them for about a year. At several points this past month, I was ready to toss that rule in the trash. After all, maybe it is a stupid rule. But I just need to pray that 1) "the" woman will come by eventually, 2) I'll recognize her, and 3) I won't go nuts waiting.

This'll be my last thought, so bear with me.

Celebacy is the supernatural removal of romantic/sexual interest in the opposite gender (or any gender, if you want to get modern). It's not a gift I've been granted.

So many people talk about making the most of your singleness. Then there's the school of thought that you need to get married ASAP. I'm sort of struggling between the two of these positions. If my life has taught me anything so far, it's that though I don't need anybody to make me whole (besides god), it's nice when there's somebody to throw your arm around on the couch. I don't want to run straight into "adulthood" and relationships, but God made Adam, Eve, to keep him company.

If a perfect Adam needed company, a fallen Josh had better get company too.

Pray that I have the strength to wait for God's hand to lead my Eve to me (or me to her). I'm quite afraid I'll take things into my own hands, out of impatience. And we know how disasterous the results of that would be.

EDIT: After thinking about this, I'm afraid this'll be interpreted as another attack. It. Is. Not. Some people that may or may not think I'm attacking them, have been some of the few showing a bit of love. Most of the problem there, comes from the love being of a different type, or being shown in different actions. I know it's there, and I thank you folks.